Fan or Follower

I'm going to borrow the title of a recent sermon for a rampage of thoughts barging their way through my mind, and even disrupting my sleep.

Family is Uber important in the Menno world (and it is important) but should it be more important than God? Jesus said unless we forsake father and mother, we can't be a Disciple... Not sure what weight our excuses hold against Jesus' words.

 How can a church full of people sit brooding over hurt feelings and contemplating a split when not so far away is a woman who needs to go to dialysis 3 days a week with no one to support her? I understand hurt feelings. I've been there. But let's not get hung up there. There's lessons to be learned, and then we need to offer hope from our own broken pieces to those who know messy better then we can imagine it.

I have begged for social worker support for more than a month, and gone on all kinds of emotional rollercoaster rides for refugee friends over a much longer period of time, but beyond the social worker community, I don't get any better response from the Christian ppl around.

I don't tell stories for entertainment or any sensations. In fact, I hate just being entertainment. But when people have called me for help for the upteenth time for a lost child or to run them to the ER... What am I to say or do when I am personally running low on all my resources, and there's no one else to call?

You don't speak the right language, you say. Love trumps every language. 

There's needs in the church, but a lot of them would resolve themselves if we stopped the platitudes in Sunday School and dived into real world problems to get our eyes off ourselves. 

I like coffee too, but sometimes it feels pretty shallow people on Instagram or Facebook, if you know what I mean. First world problems.

Why does it seem like ppl like to hear that someone is doing something as long as it doesn't require them to do anything? Or maybe they can give to a cause, but they don't want to get messy themselves? How is that ok?

There's just a lot wrong with this world and I don't understand. Maybe you can help me, but don't start on the platitudes. It's simply too much.

Lately, there's been a lot of hard stuff that isn't easy, and I don't have answers. It would be easier to live on the other side of the world and not regularly crash between 2 different worlds called the city and church.

But I think that sermon on Sunday set something straight in my mind. There's a lot more fans than followers in God's House these days. 

Followers pray and listen. They take orders. They live from the overflow of a relationship, but that's a whole other blog post. Followers don't just know facts. Followers are in a relationship with the God they love. And there's where I see how much I still need to grow as a faithful follower. You can choose to be a fan, but I would take all the aspects of being a follower. Sometimes, coffee comes with it!;)