From the Cosmetic Aisle

Arbonne. Avon. Beauti Control. Estee Lauder. Mary Kay. Natural DIY recipes. The brands go on and on. Every year we hear about a new treatment plan that is out of this world and works miracles. Women buy a new line in hopes of refreshed facial beauty. Our mothers will look young like us daughters. {yeah, right, mom} Glowing, unflawed and healthy skin touched by a kiss of foundation, blush, mascara and lipstick are what we're told makes a women stunningly gorgeous and completely captivating. A male colleague of mine back in America jokingly affirmed this one day when he told me all I need is a little make-up. “Thanks sir, for that vote of confidence.”

A famous cosmetologist once said, “The most beautiful thing a woman can have is her passion but makeup is an excellent substitute.” So why do many women settle for a substitute? Maybe because her passion has been wounded, disclaimed or discarded. They have learned their beautiful passion should be controlled.

Recently I heard a godly man speak into all this. In a nutshell, he said one word for women before the fall in the garden was beauty. And one word for women after the garden was control. He encouraged us to live out of beauty which is our original purpose instead of out of control. If we would put all the energy we put into controlling our lives into creating beauty, life would be much more meaningful and well, beautiful. I loved the idea.

If we live out of beauty, we may very possibly be hurt, intentionally or unintentionally. Girls destroy perfect roses by playing 'He loves me, he loves me not...' Little boys in school make cruel and life impacting comments. Our families impact into our beauty/control worldviews in immeasurable ways. Every woman has her story, but she is invited by God in another scene of healing.

Beauty has often been trampled and beaten down but it's essence can't be squelched and it's impact can't be stopped.

Beauty stands out starkly in harsh realities.

God restores beauty, never control.

Looking at some of the world's historic wars and what was really at stake; a king was enamored with a drop dead gorgeous queen or princess from a far away land and he was determined to have her.

Yes, Beauty is possibly the most powerful thing in this life.

Beauty is always an essence in every circumstance. Control is fleeting.

Beauty always reaches out and reconciles relationships only to become more beautiful. Control dominates relationships, only to lose them.

Beauty merits honor. Control brings shame.

Beauty isn't lonely. Control acts like it isn't.

Beauty has an alluring mystery. Controls tries to be mysterious and fails.

Beauty is really stronger then control.

As I was reflecting on all this, I remembered that I had become a Beauti Control consultant as a result of a party last year. Being a good Mennonite, I wanted the discounts and benefits of consultant status to justify the price tag. Then recently, I was thinking of ways to make some money when I returned home. Beauti Control had crossed my mind. I'd been picturing my sales pitch being something like: “I'm trying to make the lives of women in Asia more beautiful, etc... etc...”

Now there was a new sales pitch that goes more like this, “Ladies, there is a lesson from a long time ago that we all need to learn... we were made for beauty and not to control... so as you apply your daily facial routine, remind yourselves what you were created for... and live out of beauty instead of control.”

I don't know about you but I could get passionate about selling the message of 'beauty instead of control.' Now that's a message of fabulously breath taking, beautiful hope worth talking about. I'll still be sharing the message whether I decide to sell the products or not. The message proclaiming "Beauti instead of Control."

Raw Emotion

It feels like a while since this blog has contained some raw footage. Raw exposure to my environment. Raw- unedited. Raw-natural, unrefined, untouched-virtually beautifully pure. Raw-no moral of the story applied. Raw-no life lesson gleaned. Just plain, word pictures of what my eyes have encountered in the eyes of those I've met. Eyes of the orphans. Eyes of the beggars. Eyes of the stressed workers. Eyes of people I haven't seen for a while and reveling in their presence. Eyes of people who know no hope. Eyes of people who have sought but haven't found, and gave up. The cry for love and grace is everywhere. Sometimes it rises to the surface. Sometimes it's buried beneath layers and requires shoveling.

When we meet the raw, we make choices. What will I do with this? Am I willing to feel what they are feeling? Or will I choose to walk away and refuse to offer? Am I going to say this is just how life is and stay out of it or am I willing to get messy?

For the long term, what should my involvement be? What is going to help them and not hurt them more?

In the meantime as I'm contemplating all this, 2 different people pass away back in America. 2 different families are grieving the sudden loss of a parent this week. The children of both are people I've either studied with or worked with for a longer period of time. And I can't really understand how they feel right now or what their description of raw would look like. There aren't any answers. And all this has added a whole new thread to my thoughts on raw reality.

This thread adds an urgency to make the most of life. To love well. To be wise about how I use my resources. To reach out and touch those around me who are seeking for love. To be intentional in loving my family from long distance. To not allow the woes of the world to keep me from friending the people in it. To not allow small annoyances and raw issues to become so Big...

Each of us is an uncompleted story. The raw fibers are still be woven and none of us know exactly what the end result is going to be. None of us know what today's pain will weave into our journal. None of us completely can grasp the raw character of another person. None of us choose the pain, the joy, or the circumstances we experience in life. And that pretty much levels the playing field of life.

So why not enjoy each "raw" individual for who they are? Why not just freely love when the other option is? Why not cut ourselves and others some slack and grant grace where it isn't merited?

Today I choose to believe there is beauty in the raw... I choose to believe that God knows what He is making... and I choose to accept that life will always have pain. I choose to allow God to use the messy things in life to make me a better person. And yes, there's a part of me that screaming, "NOOO! don't say that!" I accept the fact that I'm still raw, unfinished, and unrefined. And I accept the truth that God won't leave me in my natural state. I also accept the truth that God will use me to make a difference even while I'm 'undone.'

Values

What do you always find time for?
What matters to me?
What will I give all my savings to?
What or Who am I allowing to be my Master?

Take a dollar for example. The way I'd spend it is probably different from the way you'd spend it and neither of us may be wrong in how we use it. TM used this as an example at the homeless shelter this week in his message. Values... mine...yours... God's...

As I've been telling people recently that I'm going back to Asia, I've gotten a variety of responses. Some positive. Some questioning that I would go "Again." When it comes down to it, I think it's basically a difference in our values.

For me, Asia/Burmese ppl/human trafficking/member care floats about the top of my list. For starters, I've felt God calling me in this direction. For another reason, it's God's heart that His people go and tell about His glory. He didn't bless me to hog it all to myself. He's blessed me to share the teaching that I've gotten, the money I've made, the faith I have with anyone that crosses my path and anything else He's given me.

Having said all that, there is a part of me that would love to just not be so "out of the box." To just be more "normal." Whatever that is?!!!!!!!!! At the same time, I have zero regrets about where God has taken me over the years. It's been an amazing ride and most certainly is far from boring.

So because I already love these people and care about them on both sides of the globe, I'm going to dive into learning a language that is very different from my own. I'm gonna go in over my head and because I know God, I know I'll survive with crazy stories that are full of His fingerprints. And whatever He's going to teach me along the way may create more "unique and unusual" things in my worldview but I know it's going to be good.

"My Thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My Ways." That means a shift in values. It means being a "peculiar person" for His glory. It means I no longer try to be my kind of "normal" but His kind of 'normal'.

Pray with me as I go on this journey of faith.

Proposals

"Will you ______________?"
"Yes!!!!!"

 Do you remember a day when God got intimate with you and asked you a question that would change the rest of your life?

I still remember the day I decided God was a "hopeless" romantic... and will always treasure it...

Recently I've been contemplating what it feels like to God to have us as "lovers." I doubt that He feels that same warm, fuzzy, lovey dovey feeling that I get when I have a special divinely appointed day that reminds me that Someone cares for my heart.

I can't imagine what it must feel like when we come wanting to discuss our work, our journey, our goals and our purpose...everything except our mutual love during those prayer moments. "Good grief! can't we just talk about 'us??!!'

 "When are you going to change this or that..." or  "God, couldn't You do_____________" or "Please open the door to______________" the list goes on and on...It's a miracle He keeps us alive when the very things we complain about are His gifts of love working for our greater good.

Another classic I'm sure the Trinity rolls their eyes over is when we get a break through. We run all over, telling everyone and then forget to say "Thanks!" Oh, we may utter a thankful thought or two, but we don't sit down and revel in His Love.

If we really think God is awesome, amazing, all-powerful, magnificant, and worthy of all honor and praise, shouldn't we find time to delight in Him? To bow in awe before Him? To find ways to "romance" God?

So in what ways can we romance God?
In what ways can we enjoy Him?
What does it mean to bring Him pleasure?

I don't have answers but I do know that our Relationship with Him is why we exist. Not our work, not our journey, not our goals...no, our purpose is a relationship with God Himself. And then to love all the others-unreached, black, white, brown, creamy, and tanned people by telling them about this amazing Love relationship.

Pain Management

As part of my medical records career, I enter data into an electronic chart with many tabs and subtabs for tests, consults and a multitude of other necessities like HIPPA releases of information. One of the frequently used tabs is called "Pain Management." All kinds of chronic body aches and pain medications are mentioned.
 It seems that in today's world, we believe that we are entitled to live without pain for as long as we live. No physical pain, emotional pain and certainly no spiritual pain should be in store for anyone and most certainly not a Christian.
I recall my own horror when I heard someone say a few years ago that pain is a good thing. He mentioned the 'Joy of Pain' book about Lepers in India who have lost limbs or burned their toes/fingers due to lack of feeling pain. In their situation, pain would save them...
Last year at school, I often mused over the class by Val about learning more through pain then through the joys of life. I couldn't believe it was true but as I reflected over my own life, I realized that it was indeed completely accurate. I don't know why I would have the nerve to question someone who has walked through more pain then I can imagine with losing a spouse and a child and who knows what other pain. I'm sure somedays teachers just want to "tell" their students!:)
Over the past year, I've felt the pain of closed doors and watched friends and family walk through different trials and struggles. More then once, I've wanted to hug their pain away. To totally obliterate it. Erase it from their life and even more to delete it from their hearts.
But for a butterfly to gain it's wings, it must go through a dormant stage. Listen to mothers talk and you know no birth is easy. Look at the cross... Anything that is important, comes with pain.
The lyrics of a song have spoken to me about embracing the pain and walking through it to greater redemption of my heart... Here goes the chorus:

Life is hard and pain is real
But the strongest hearts are not made of steel
They're made of tenderness and trust.
Sometimes life has it's way with us
And we find it's the heartaches, struggles and scars
That makes the strongest hearts.

So if pain is one of the main chiselers in the box, then why not be willing to joyfully endure to the end for a delightful new product within our heart that amazes us?
What if pain is what keeps us dependant on God? What if pain ultimately is a reminder that this life won't ever completely satisfy us and keeps us longing for something better that we'll only find in Heaven? What if pain is really what is going to keep us, sorta like the lepers, away from the fire of hell? What if pain is really the only way to save us from ourselves and our depraved habits?
We've heard time and again that God doesn't give us more then we can handle and that what He does is for our good, so why not ask God to be our "pain manager?" They always say,"He specializes in taking good care of His children." And I've rolled my eyes on that one as many times as you have... Even when it doesn't feel good, He has our greater good in mind.

Sometimes it's like another song's chorus goes...

Cause what if Your blessings come through rain drops?
What if your healing comes through tears?
And what if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near?
And what if the trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise?

So all my dear friends who are facing hard times and tough mountains, don't stop believing that God really does care and He is in control. God loves you more then you'll ever know. Someday, as unrealistic as it seems now, you will fly again. I'll believe it until you can believe it for yourself.

Back to those pain management reports at work, sometimes the results aren't desirable. But God's ways are different. Promise.

For the Praise of Good Men

　 Over the past few weeks, I’ve found myself listening to various women discussing the “idiots and any cuss word you want to imagine” in their lives. They spew all their grievances and then turn to Face book or better yet, the local sheriff’s online catalog of men to show a picture of the “criminal” they were married to or dated. They have issues trusting their current "significant other" but what can they expect if they have also had several relationships and no marital commitments?!
Another thing I’ve noticed recently is the minivans driving around with a bumper sticker that reads, “I have one of the few good men.” Come on, you can’t even mention a good man without making reference to the bad ones.
These conversations leave me frustrated with 3 choices:
a: turn to the typical single lady cynicism
b: decide to focus on the good men in my life and give them some recognition.
c: tell the women that Mennonite men are generally not jail birds and come to church to meet them-- not recommended! J
There are many of these men out there who look out for the women in their lives, support their family, spend time with their children, put love and energy into their marriage relationship, their ministry and their church. They aren’t necessarily the “Head turners” or Charmers but they are faithful in doing what God has called them to.
They pray, they lead, they care, they live… and they deserve to be thanked…and to be recognized, admired, recommended, complimented, prayed for, followed, encouraged, blessed, and surrounded by cheerleaders.
They paint when they would rather be taking a nap… they change the diaper when they would rather be out golfing… they give up their personal desires for the good of those following them… they pursue missions instead of careers… their lives speak of dedication, of fighting for others, of passion for Christ, of God’s wild heart…
I’d like to suggest that circumstances are the only difference between an “idiot” and a good man. Circumstances like a respectful woman standing behind him, a mother who was kind to him, a sister who encouraged him… and most of all, a transformation created by an Awesome God that he continues to walk with.
For all I know, the random men who hold the door at the bank might be the “idiots” they talk about. I wonder what would happen if they would start being more kind and supportive…more respectful…more thankful?
If you have a good man in your life, recognize him without bringing up the bad guys. Appreciate that he is in your life. Take care of him and he will probably take care of you. J And if you ever get done with that assignment, go tell all the other women out there how to be respectful.
If you have an "idiot"... look beyond his actions and see if there isn't something inside him that could be motivated for better causes. Best of all, get to know God for yourself and let Him transform you first.